Strength of a hundred men.

[Faye]

As life goes on everyone has there ups and downs. I've been on a down for the last few years, I got into some trouble and hit a real low in my life a few years ago, it effected a lot more people than just me, but I've grown a lot since then. My mother was a big part of picking me back up and getting me back on my feet. My mother and I have a really good relationship, we really always have despite some of our differences. But as I have grown over the last few years our rolls have reveresed and my life as sort of been heading towards an up.

Over the past year and a half it has changed to where she leans on me for support more than I on her. From the closing of her florist in which I supported the two of us finicially for quite some time, to now to where it is a lot of emotional support due to recent events. Something I never thought I would have to do with my mother. But with her not having anyone else in her life I am more than happy to do so.

Last week my Mother was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. As it stands we know little to nothing about it. Only that there is a large mass in her right breast. And ever through the news after her mamagram last thursday, she still seemed to be very strong, of course a few tears were shed, that is to be expected, but never a full blown breakdown.

I suppose it was bound to happen. Last night shortly before she went to bed, she broke. Her tears ran and she sobbed for quite some time. And I was doing really well, comforting her, reassuring her, not so much as shedding a tear, right up until she said one thing... "I dont want to die". I just counldnt handle it after that.It is very hard to remain strong after you hear those words come out of anyones mouth, let alone a parent. And its not even if the thought of her dying from this hadnt crossed my mind. Its just to hear her say it had a whole different impact. I didnt expect her to want to die, I dont thing anyone wants to die.

Those of you that know me the best, know that I am an emotional person. So this is very hard for me. Even after the orginal diagnosis, I went and had my breakdown to Dai and Aradia just so mom wouldnt have to see me. Because this is the point where I have to be strong, and I dont have the option to let her lean on someone else because there is no one else. And after last night I kinda feel like I failed her. I feel so helpless, I cant even do so much as provide her with emotional support or a shoulder to cry on.

Her appointment with the surgeon got postponned to tomorrow morning, so that went over real well. We assume he will order a full body scan to figure out if the cancer has spread anywhere else. And I think if we can discover that that hasnt happend she will be a lot more at ease. But if it has, then things are going to get a lot worse.

Anyways, thanks for reading, I appreciate all you guys. I just kinda needed an outlet for a few things.

[Blackmage]

She'll be in my thoughts and you as well. I hope they can remove all of it and that it never comes back.

[Legend]

The Oversoul (whomever you might believe this is) continue to give you strength and protect the both of you from harm. You are in my thoughts. You can fight this together. ^^

[Shino]

Faye, you are far from alone my friend.

And there is hope. Breast Cancer treatment these days is excellent if it's caught early.

http://www.imaginis.com/breasthealth/staging.asp
http://www.cancer.org

This is a treatable disease. You need to stay positive for your mother. Do some research and try to find out more about it. Things she can do.

This is something you can get through Faye. I know you. And I know you can do this. This is your mother. Fight for her! And I will help you!

This is why I fight every year for people to donate to the ACS. I give my time and my money willingly to fight this horrible disease.

And it will pay off. Cancer will be a thing of the past in our lifetime!

I've already contacted my ACS rep here in GA. Asking her to give me any info about the ACS branches in TX. Who to talk to, what you can do to help her, that kind of thing.

In the mean time, find out who you can contact from the ACS near you. And fight out what you can be doing to make things easier.

You and your mother are in my thoughts and my prayers. No matter what happens. You are not alone.

I lost my father to cancer.
Ming lost his father to cancer.
Mister Sparkle lost his mother to cancer.

But then, go to a Relay for Life and see how many of those have fought and beaten this disease.

Being diagnosed with cancer doesn't mean you are going to die anymore. Fight! Fight hard! And Win!

And were here with you to help you in the fight! And please, find a Relay in your area and bring your mother to it. Trust me. It will change your lives forever!

Edit:
This is an email from the ACS rep that I work with Faye... She's one of the most incredible people I've ever known.

[Faye]

Thanks, those websites have helped me to understand it a little better. The preliminary report from the surgeon is that it is Stage 3. But she will be going in for a Biopsy and Ct scan in about an hour to tells us a little more. In the past 24 hours we've had family arive from all over the state to be with her. She actually had her sister and 2 other friends in the examination room with her this morning. And the Surgeon she has examining her is a family friend, so I believe she is as comfortable as she can be at this point. It all just kinda depends on how the rest of the tests come out this afternoon.

Again thank you for the information shino.

[Shino]

Keep me up to date Faye! I will do anything I can to help you and your family. I'm not sure how much that is this far away from you, but I'll do my best.

And stay positive. I know it's hard, but this is a challenge that has been placed before you. As much as you would rather not have it, it's there. Be tough and hang with it. You CAN beat this!

This year there was a break through! For the first time in history, the number of cancer related deaths went DOWN! It wasn't a huge number, but it did go down. The methods are improving and the care is getting better. Keep your head up and try to keep your mother's spirits high.

[Silver Adept]

This is treatable stuff. Keep your spirits and once the stuff is out, we hope it never comes back.

[Kudasai Hiroki]

You're both in our thoughts and prayers! You can get through this, stay strong and keep us posted!

[Akanari]

I send you all my luck, truly.

While my grandmother did die from cancer, hers was caught ridiculously late and there was nothing the doctors could do.

It was a rare case.

My other grandmother survived breastcancer and is kickin' it now, happy and stronger because of it.
My uncle had a brain tumor about 8 years ago, and now just finished law school.

Yes, this is treatable, but while you're going to doctors and getting tests and trying to treat her body, don't forget about her spirit. The worst thing to lose is her will, so it's a great idea to get her a therapist (counselor, whatever) if she doesn't already have one. While she does need strength, I think it is a good thing that you broke down while with her. It lets her see how much it affects you, and how much this fight is for everybody.

Strength is honesty. Strength is admitting that you're afraid.

Your mother and you are both in my thoughts.

[Buda]

Surely you know you have the strenght of more than 100 PO's behind you . We are all here for you to draw on, and we keep your mother and you in our thoughts and prayers.