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Ming
DOOM!
Gender: 
Joined: 13 Jan 2003 |
 Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 10:20 am Post subject: Buzzword Bingo! |
I've been working in offices for a while now, and one of the things that has really started to grate on my nerves are the use of corporate buzzwords in order to make one sound smarter. Granted, the office that I work in now isn't as bad as when I worked for Pepsi, but no office is completely immune to this behavior.
So for anyone who works in an office (or hears these on a regular basis) which are the ones that bug you the most? I'll get the ball rolling here (dammit, I just used one!)...
REACH OUT - "If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to reach out to myself or my team."
Which traslates to..."Call me if you have any questions." |
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Spinning around and being graceful looks cool, but then someone comes along and cuts something off, and the fight is over.
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Akanari
Owns your reality
Gender: 
Joined: 29 Sep 2004 |
| Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 11:31 am Post subject: |
Game Plan.
I hate that. No, I don't work in an office, but I'm surrounded by people that do (including my business-exuberant father) who always use buzzwords. RAWR. >:[ |
_________________
Our freedom is consuming itself,
What we will become is contrary to what we want
Take a bow. |
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Crown of Thorns (Partisan)
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Reverend
I kin
Age: 41
Gender:
Joined: 21 Oct 2002 |
| Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 11:37 am Post subject: |
YES!!!
Buzzword bingo returns! I remember playing it in high school at all-school gatherings.
And because you already used it bud...
"BALL ROLLING" So I want to get the ball rolling on this project by setting up the meeting schedule for project planning.
Translation- I'm starting this, but don't want to keep it going. Someone else take ove |
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Pot, Burden of Dilligence, One of the Pans of the aPOcalypse
PONY's Preacher Man
Token Social Scientist
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Ruler, the Fist of Mod (Mace)
(400 - 460) |
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Tobias
*explodes*
Age: 38
Gender:
Joined: 17 Jan 2003 |
| Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 12:41 pm Post subject: |
A-sap (A.S.A.P.) Translation: To get something done "As soon as Possible."
yea, if you can get those TPS cover sheets done for me A-sap, that would be grand. |
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Nor afraid of what Death will bring.
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Ming
DOOM!
Gender:
Joined: 13 Jan 2003 |
| Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 2:28 pm Post subject: |
These really aren't buzzwords, but these are some that I hear EVERY...FREAKIN'...DAY, and I'm assuming that they're common to most offices...
THE GAME as in "Hey, did you see the game last night?"
TRAFFIC as in "The traffic was TERRIBLE this morning!"
BACKROADS as in "Oh yeah, the traffic is terrible...you HAVE to learn the backroads..."
It's just like...don't you people have ANYTHING better to talk about then damn sports and the freakin' traffic or how your way is just oh so much better to get to work because you know how to avoid the highway?!
No! I don't play golf! Get outta my cubicle before I attack you with my stapler!!! |
_________________
Spinning around and being graceful looks cool, but then someone comes along and cuts something off, and the fight is over.
Official UP lover!
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Wins 41 - Losses 44
Level 10 |
EXP: 5223
HP: 2300
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STR: 900
END: 700
ACC: 1000
AGI: 800
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Equitas (Sword)
(385 - 385) |
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Doot
Cute and Non-Abrasive Hyper Hypo
Gender:
Joined: 15 Sep 2002 |
| Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 3:14 pm Post subject: |
Weather / traffic / Day of the Week are ALL conversation fillers and sometimes all any folks in an office can speak about to find a "common ground". It's basically saying - I have nothing better to converse with you about than completely unchangable, mundane things.
When I'm in an elevator I usually light heartedly joke with someone if I get the feeling the person is easy going.
Buzzword Time!
Thrown Under the Bus: "I do my work but I constantly get thrown under the bus when others don't do theirs!"
Translation - I'm made the scapegoat by lazy coworkers who try to get me in trouble for their personal gain.
Translsation |
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Doot vanishes fast.
"Is it wind that makes that sound?"
"No. It is your doom."
"Makai shotto!" (Yeah, I'm sexy ain't I!) |  |
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SirGunslinger
Rebel without a clue
Gender:
Joined: 21 Jun 2007 |
| Posted: Fri Oct 12, 2007 5:27 pm Post subject: |
Some evil buzzwords used at work..
Feed him to the Process -> Stick as much red tape infront of the person as possible, and make him cry.
Throw it in the Sharktank -> When shopping for software or hardware put about 10 company reps on a public e-mail requesting a quote.
This isn't a Half Day -> Said to someone who cannot leave until a problem is fixed (might stay till AM) |
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I do not kill with my gun; he who kills with his gun has forgotten the face of his father. I kill with my heart.
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Al the DLOE
Director of Unpleasent Facts Dept.
Age: 43
Gender:
Joined: 05 Dec 2006 |
| Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2007 4:30 pm Post subject: |
i have not had to deal with many buzz words but then again my anti-bs field prolly translates them so fast i dont see them. hard to bullshit in engineering unless you are Scotty or have to deal with a satelite manager (a manager who is connected to you in name and title only but has no fucking idea what you actually do there AKA pointy hair boss) |
_________________
"There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness."
-Friedrich Nietzsche
"A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel."
-Robert Frost
"What luck for rulers that men do not think."
-Adolf Hitler
Get off a shot FAST, this upsets him long enough to let you make your
second shot perfect. - Robert A Heinlein.
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/conspiracy_theories.png |
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Jaena
Senior Otaku
Gender:
Joined: 09 Jan 2007 |
| Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2007 6:22 pm Post subject: |
One phrase that makes me want to strangle someone
THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX- We need to think outside the box on this one.
Translation: Make some random shit up for a plan. If it fails, we can blame it on trying to be different. |
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Al the DLOE
Director of Unpleasent Facts Dept.
Age: 43
Gender:
Joined: 05 Dec 2006 |
| Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2007 6:52 pm Post subject: |
| Jaena wrote: | One phrase that makes me want to strangle someone
THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX- We need to think outside the box on this one.
Translation: Make some random shit up for a plan. If it fails, we can blame it on trying to be different. |
hard to think outside the box when you never where in it.... |
_________________
"There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness."
-Friedrich Nietzsche
"A liberal is a man too broadminded to take his own side in a quarrel."
-Robert Frost
"What luck for rulers that men do not think."
-Adolf Hitler
Get off a shot FAST, this upsets him long enough to let you make your
second shot perfect. - Robert A Heinlein.
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/conspiracy_theories.png |
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Wins 49 - Losses 75
Level 14 |
EXP: 7082
HP: 2623
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STR: 913
END: 855
ACC: 1290
AGI: 742
|
30mm Autocannon of Lesser Justice (Sniper)
(130 - 760) |
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