Turkey...my way

Tobias · *explodes* Age: 38 Gender: Joined: 17 Jan 2003

So, you think you know how to make a Thanksgiving turkey, eh? I don't think so, bub. There are many things that you must do to shape that bird into beauty; steps that need to be taken in order to make that bird into your prize.

The first step...addressing the bird. One must find one of these magnificent beings, so full of honor and dignity, and hunt it down most carefully and skillfull.

Second, after one acquires the Bird, one believes that they must season it to perfection, in order to make it into the hall of fame for "Birds." What they don't realize is that the bird requires a salt water bath...or Brine. After acquiring the turkey, we must place it in a proper recepticle full of this Brine to soak up the glorious juices that make the Gods at Val Halla weap.

So you left that turkey there to think itself over for the night. Now the time has come for the turkey to take a trip to hell. Dont worry...the Bird won't notice a thing save for the 3 hours of intense heat that will make it's succulent meat taste oh-so-very amazing.

Removing the bird and carving that turkey is all that's left. Just you, the blade, and the turkey. Let me tell you now, that turkey isn't just cooked; it's happy, and a happy turkey makes a happy cook...and that's all hunkey dorey.

So we come to the end of our ride...all thats left is you, and a platter of turkey bones that let you revelle back to the journey. Yet, lets review...shall we?

Happy Thankgiving! And many hopes that all of you enjoyed this little ensemble!

Reverend · I kin Age: 41 Gender: Joined: 21 Oct 2002

I was doing fine till it began basting, then I fell on the floor laughing

Therin · Gloompf. Iggle! Gender: Joined: 24 Sep 2002

My Dad made a damn good turkey...but it took him three hours longer than he thought it would

Faye · Luna Sierra Age: 42 Gender: Joined: 28 Apr 2004

Damn Tobs.... that looks like a very tasty Turkey.

Kiyomi · Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2004 12:18 am Post subject:

LMAO! Tobs, you are too funny! I love the pictures! "Aww, crap..."

okami · Senior Otaku Gender: Joined: 29 Sep 2004

well.....nice turkey but.... what if your not eating turkey does the same thing apply to pork and duck?? Wink

sorry had to ask...

GAAZ · MOD Black Sheep Commander Gender: Joined: 14 Oct 2002

My mom did this Kosher salt brine bath thing one year...I gotta tell you people that was a hella awesome turkey.

If you ever see your neighbors doing it get a girout wire ready cause when it's done cookin you're gonna haveta kill for that bird.

Tobias · *explodes* Age: 38 Gender: Joined: 17 Jan 2003

well, for pork, i cant say the same thing...i mean, too many cuts work well off of pork, but apparently, you can brine it too. As for the duck though, its almost the same thing, minus all the extra sinew that a turkey has, and make it even more flimsy and floppy than a chicken

Satine · Evil Onigiri Age: 37 Gender: Joined: 29 Sep 2004

Hah, we don't even bother with roasting the turkey anymore. We fry that baby up!
Yep. Fried turkey. And it's sooooo good. And so much faster than roasting. Only 3 minutes per pound.
I have pictures too!
My dad and I lowering the bird
Still lowering it... (We put a little too much oil in the fryer. Oops...)
Voila! Fried turkey.

underpants · awesome sauce! Age: 41 Gender: Joined: 07 Jul 2004

Tobs!!! That is the bestest story i've read in a LONG time!!! Complete with pictures and everything!!!!
That bird looks mighty tasty! Wish I coulda had some....maybe andy will sneak me a taste Wink