How could u?

[simply jose]

Its been five years since I was engaged to the only person I have truly ever loved. I have never fallen in love again and I didnt know wut love was before her. I've missed her everyday from morning to night and backwards. Love so strong can only be seen in movies. We ended breaking up cuz she had cheated on me but I didnt know with who. Today after five years; one of my best friends finally told me the truth of who she cheated with and it turns out it was one of the only 3 ppl I considered my brothers. I had been there for this person and I would have died for this person. I was there when his kids were born, when he got married, I introduced him to his wife and looked after his family when he was gone, I stabbed everybody in the back to defend this so called brother, and I truly believed him when he said nothing ever happened. It is sad that I had to find out through his other best friend who thought I knew by this point. He knew how much I was hurt by the breakup and that for the first 2 yrs I was so depressed I turned to alcohol, drugs, and I even tried to take my life once while under the influence. While I was going through the worst time of my life, this person stood right next to me hipocritically pretending to be a friend. 5 years later I should be over it and I really am over her but the feeling of betrayal that comes from knowing the one I called my brother was the one who made me bleed and destroyed me. Now all that is on my mind is How could u?
How could u stand there and see me down and about and pretend to be a friend? How could u lie to me for so long and make me feel like crap when ever I would doubt? How could u turn ur back on such a strong friendship and hurt me to the point were I wouldnt wanna live? Is getting laid so important to u that u were willing to sacrifice our friendship?

I've always prided myself in being a christian and forgiving, but I guess my faith in people has been finally broken. It is 2am and I cant sleep so I just wanted to get things of my chest.


leave me some love, I could use it.

[Sciler]

I've sort of been in your shoes, I too was the one who was cheated on...multiple times. It hurts. It hurt for a long time. I even tried to work through things once I found out, but ultimately, due to other reasons things just didnt work out.

There was a lot of anger for a long, long time. I was hurt unbelievably. I had given all I had, to get nothing in return once things had gotten bad. For a year, things were great, and I still do not regret anything, except allowing myself to be hurt the way I did.

But like with most things, if you can learn from it, then you're doing good. Your friend probably stuck by you because he felt horrible about what happened. He probably never told you, because he was embarrassed and ashamed.

I believe everything happens for a reason, we dont always know why until years and years later, but it does make us stronger overall.

Since it was so long ago, I would say that there is no point in digging up the past...but if you are still close to this person now, and what you found out still bothers you, I say talk to him about it, man to man sometime, and try not to get angry as you talk about it. Mainly it sounds like you just need closure...and while it will hurt, for both of you, sometimes talking can help. Maybe you just need to hear his reasons why he never told you, or maybe someone has misinformation and your friend didnt do it after all.

Don't always believe in what you hear, unless it is from the persons involved. People LOVE to stir up drama, even your closest friends.

BTW - talking about it and forgiving can mend things. I know from personal experience. I am still friends with my ex whom at the time broke my heart, it took many years for him to come around mind you , but ultimately once we talked, his friendship meant more to me, than holding a grudge was worth. He is now married, and I am happy that they make each other happy, and they have 2 lovely kids. AND I also forgave one of the people whom he cheated with, who was a friend, and we too are friends as well.

I dont know if this helps any, but if you want to talk some time let me know.

[FawkesFyre]

I'm so sorry to hear that...reminds me of bits and pieces of my own past from high school and college. Sadly, we're only human, and we all make mistakes. Talk to this friend you call a brother and at least discuss the situation and get it out there in the open. You might be able to stay friends, you might not...but you'll at least clear the air.

For some reason, that I cannot even answer, some people choose to not mention information until years later. I've been through a messy breakup before where everyone was telling me a different story...but I didn't learn the truth until over 3 years later from my ex when he told me who he left me for...

Hang in there...

[simply jose]

At this point, I really dont wanna talk. He actually did the same thing to my other friend and I knew about it and kept it quiet to help him out. He's done it various times to various ppl. I wouldnt wanna hear his reason cuz no reason is good enuff to do the same thing over n over to the ppl who have been ur family. Why bother with him? He is a lying twofaced hipocrit and all he cares about is wut he wants and how to get it no matter wut it costs everyone else.

[Sciler]

Well, I guess I misunderstood that you guys were closer more recently than things actually are? If thats the case, then yeah, let the past remain thier and move on with your life. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders, in time you'll find a good woman to match that head.

[simply jose]

Lol, rite now I'm more worried about finding a job hahahahaha. I do appreciate the replies from everyone. I needed to vent and had no one to vent to.

[Aiman]

[Skylah]

[simply jose]

The only reason why I disagree is cuz I myself have seen him do it to other ppl and in all honesty all stories from all different sides match except for him. Plus his made some comments in the past that lead me o believe the truth. Like I said, Ive been done with her for 5 yrs, shoulda been done with him too

[SirGunslinger]

I think the best way to handle the situation is to walk up to him and say "Face or Gut". Then, throw him a beating, pick him up, proceed to get shit faced drunk together, and move on with life.

All this stuff happened 5 years ago. Forget about the drama, it isn't worth getting so worked up about something that happened so long ago. I remember getting told 2 years after I broke up with a girl that a friend of mine slept with her also... hell I congratulated him on finally getting laid. To me it happened so long ago that it was all "water under the bridge" at that point.

I found out later that apparantly the only reason the girl slept with him was to get me angry... well the jokes on her.