A BIG change! Need advice...

Akuko · Chosen of Bast Age: 45 Gender: Joined: 03 Mar 2006

Hello All. After almost two months of unemployment I found a new job! Now the only problem is, it sucks donkey balls! I am a glorified telemarketer for a car company and try to get potential customers to come into the dealership. The pay stinks, the commission isn't much and my boss is probably five years younger than I am!

My mother has an open invitation to move back home (Green Bay WI) and go back to school.

I'm just not sure if I should go through with it!

Cons are: no pets, so I would have to rehome my furmen (my two ADORABLE kitties whom I LOVE), a lot less freedom (no late nights out at the bar and FORGET about dating!), plus, I would have to live under the thumb of my neatfreak stepdad for at least two years.

Pros are: Being able to focus all my energy on my studies/classes rather than worrying about bills/groceries/etc. Have more time to work on my physique along with a free membership to a gym. (I am clinically overweight and sick of shopping at the "big girl" store). Once I graduate, I have a better chance of landing a "good" job with better pay as I will be more attractive to potential employers(or at least, that's what my mother says).

I'm still debating what my major will be or if I should do community college and get an associates degree in paralegal studies or criminal justice. I have so many interests that it is difficult to focus on just one area of study, but I don't want to get a BS/BA degree (heavy on the 8ullSh17) which (according to my research)wouldn't guarantee me a good job anyways.

Any thoughts?

Shino · Posted: Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:39 am Post subject:

Do you know for a fact that your parents will restrict your freedoms?
Have they told you that is a stipulation of you moving back in?

I'll tell you what... I lived at home throughout college. Didn't actually move out of my house until I was 23 b/c of that.

Was a great decision. I didn't have a lot of student loans to pay off and after I was planning on moving out and confronted her about my "curfew" she pretty much laid off that.

If your parents want you to move back in, I would talk to them about the "curfew" thing. You're an adult, you should be allowed to do what you want. I would say as long as they know what you're doing, they should be fine with it.

FawkesFyre · Posted: Tue Dec 15, 2009 1:18 am Post subject:

Its a big decision and a lot of adjustments to make to move back in with your parents. I second what Shino said in that you're an adult and should be treated like one. But, it sounds like moving back would have some big costs too. I know how much you love your pets. For me, that would be the deciding point. If I couldn't have my kitties, the deal would be off.

But, having a degree is important. Is there any way you could swing school without moving back?

The last thing that kind of bothered me is you mentioning your weight and how your mom has told you that slimming down will make you more appealing. You need to be comfortable with yourself, not what others think. Lose the weight for YOU.

Akuko · Chosen of Bast Age: 45 Gender: Joined: 03 Mar 2006

Thanks for the advice! I guess I should have clarified my thoughts better but the " more attractive" part was about actually having a college degree, not about my weight.

I want to lose the weight because I do. I have genetic risk factors for heart disease and I want to reduce my risks and get healthier. (Plus, looking the same on the outside as I feel on the inside wouldn't hurt. Wink

)

And the reason I can't take my cats with me is my step-dad is highly allergic. I have tried contacting family to hold on to them for me, but I've had no takers. It's a tough decision, but I have to do what's right for me. I can always get another cat, and I know they will find good, loving homes.

I can't swing school now as my job doesn't pay enough to take care of rent/bills/food etc on top of going to school( I can't even afford company health insurance right now).

I'm a weirdo I guess. I prefer to focus on one thing at a time rather than do school full-time AND work full-time. I just know one or the other would suffer greatly.

My folks really didn't talk about "curfew" or anything like that but they did understand I wanted my privacy and be able to do what I want to do when I want, as long as it is respectful.

Shino · Posted: Wed Dec 16, 2009 9:58 am Post subject:

School is very important... I say go for it.

If your parents can avoid the "while you're under this roof" stuff, it's worth it.

Silver Adept · Otaku Lord Age: 41 Gender: Joined: 20 May 2003

School is definitely worth it. If you can manage to hammer it out with your parents to avoid having them treat you too much like a child (they will, but you can hopefully minimize it), then it is worth going back. It's too bad that you'll lose the fuzzies, though.