Guy's and girl's help pls

[Tenshiai]

Ok, there's it. I'm really good to give advice except...for myself in love
-_____-()

So, I'm always attract by the same kind of guy's who want to change me and want me to be perfect. Always beautiful, smilling, encourage them, be strong but look frail, helping them and protect them. When is my turn to need help they mistakes me for my weakness. After my last boysfriend I wasn't attract anymore by any men.

Now, I'm finally attract by a guy but I'm afraid to do the same pattern again. I ask myself if a guy here can tell me some advice or tips to see when a guy acting only to have a girl.

How can I know if he's not lying to me to be someone else like all the men seem to do with me ?

I would believe to already know this by now but it more complicated that I tought. I know time will help but in this case one of these play the game really seriously during 6 month.

[Silver Adept]

Are you asking whether or not you can tell that someone's not really interested in you as a person?

[Tenshiai]

Yes, it's want I'm asking for. I was fool several time. Not that nobody can't but it seem that in love it's always the same pattern that I told ya. First they treat me well and after they want me to be their mother, helper or trophy. Finally, I'm getting away more discourage.

[Reverend]

Then don't act like a trophy Tenshiai, and try to expose this potential significant other to the things that you make you who you are. Like to make clay pottery? Have this guy sit down with you and make pottery side by side with you. Happy to just watch certain kinds of movies at home, make him sit down with you and watch them. Ask him if he could help support you rather than the other way around.

I can't say that it would be good to try what's happened to you out on somebody else, but perhaps it could be helpful to be more assertive on what you'd like from a relatioship and not settle for less. It's fine to smooth out a few edges but not to sand away the whole piece

[Tenshiai]

It is true that I was not very demanding indeed. I'm not acting like a trophy but I'm not demanding and not sit anyone with me do to the thing I'm loving to do. So, that's a precious advice that you give me thank you.
^_^

[Reverend]

I have my moments, just hope that it works out for you.

[Selrahc the Evil]

I'm with reverend. just be your own person first and his girlfreind second and just stand your ground on things you feel strongly about.

[Silver Adept]

I'll agree with them. Be yourself, and see if they like it. If not, you'll know. Eventually you'll find someone who does like you as you. That's the person you'll do well with.

[Sciler]

couple of things:

One, dont just into a relationship. Start off dating and get to know one another and see how things go. By doing that it gives you a bit more time to know kinda how they may be in the longer run. If things go well, the move forward with the relationship.

Also when meeting people, try to meet outside of what you would normally go for. You'd be surprised the awesome people you can meet when you look to someone different based on a sense of humor, or sarcasm, or dorkness, etc.

Go for the good guy for the most part. They are the ones who are going to take care of you first, not themselves. Nice guys finish last, but they get the girl worth getting through patience and understanding and caring. THey are the best to go for.

Lastly, as much as its hard to do this, try not to stop yourself from liking someone or whatnot. You'll never meet that right person if you give no one a chance. Love hurts because of a lot of factors, but when you find hte right person, the good feelings far outwiegh the bad. Its never an easy road, it takes work and patience on both ends, but its not an impossible road either. Dont block yourself from emotion....i know all too well just how much it hurts, but i also know the hardship of unlocking that wall you can put up around yourself as protection. Just take small steps int he right direction instead of big ones and you'll be ok

wow i ramble >_<

[mysticdragon]

Sciler is very right.

one mistake i've mage in the past is to get too close, and too attached, and in the end all it got me was lots of pain, lies and she cheated on me, i thought i knew her, thought we were close, of one mind and two bodies. my point with this, is that you can never be truly sure of another's actions and thoughts. because of what she has done, i have come to have a very pessismistic view of relationships. but not all hope is lost, there will be someone there for everybody, it's just a matter of time until you find them. keep on the lookout.

but as for signs of what he thinks of you...look at people he dated in the past, and ask them...they will know his patterns.