Question of the Day

[Shandriz]

You know. I was reading through a few of my old livejournal posts, and it's interesting, what reading about yourself and your past actions makes you think about. I think I may just start a Question of the Day sort of thread ^_^ I'll ask a question, see what you guys think, and then after a day or two ask another.

Like how girls and guys can't be just friends. I had the worst time in high school because my best friend was a guy. Now, I love him dearly, and as he mentioned yesterday-- I'm one of five people within a hundred mile radius he'd trust with his life, despite me being clumsy and pathetic. But the thing is, people really screwed up our friendship during our years in high school because everyone kept asking whether or not we were going out. When would we start going out? Why weren't we going out yet? You know you two are going to end up together.

As though there isn't enough of self-doubt in high school, they had to throw in that wrench. Every time someone would say that I'd step back and go "Why -aren't- I dating him? Is there something I'm just not seeing about myself? Do I really feel that way about him? Does he feel that way about me?"

And we tried it once. We dated for a couple of months before it got too weird and I panicked and broke up with him. And Hell, even now I sometimes wonder how I feel about him. But I always wish noone had ever brought it up. Because then I'd know for sure.

Why can't girls and guys just be friends?

[Shurikane]

[GAAZ]

A guy and girl usually can't JUST be friends because the world in general can't accept it. Like you said when you see a guy and girl together they are automatically a couple unless there are more guys or girls present.

That's not to say they CAN'T be friends but usually being around the other so much you wonder WHY yer not together...After 2+ years of friendship between a girl and a guy the girl has prolly been hurt all over the place or something and the guy has either hurt others for "good" reasons or been hurt himself through the girls eyes. Then the girl starts to consider WHY she's not with him.

A guy can normally be friends with a girl a long time (Not counting pre-pubesent into post-pubesent) and not really consider dating the girl because the girl adopts the roll of little sister. IE that girl is now his sister and NEEDS him to protect her from all the dicks out there. SO they are all protective and such.

It's kind of a hard thing to think about but eh..it works....Or something.

[Shandriz]

An excellent point. With the abovementioned friend, I -do- mostly think of him like the brother I wished I had. (as I don't particularly get along with the one I do) it's just that it's particularly frustrating when someone throws that assumption at us. After five years, you'd think people would get the idea it's probably not going to happen.

[Daijaga]

My best friend was a girl for a very very long time, like since we were kids. We got the exact same treatment that your talking about too. I finally had to go and marry some other girl to get ppl to shut up. So the moral of the story is...go get married to someone else? Worked for me.

Seriously though, and I mean no offense toward girls, but girls tend to form emotional attachments easier. Men, generally speaking, are more standoffish emotionally. Where you were saying to yourself "Why aren't I dating him?" he might have been thinking "That would be like dating my sister". Kinda like Az said. In any case, ppl suck and arnt to be trusted in groups over two, unless they are POs of course. So the moral of the story is...life sucks sometimes.

Dancing helps though.

[Shandriz]

I am a slacker. . But, here's t he question for today--

A lot of people don't like Valentine's Day. There are several reasons for this. Most of the time (from what I can tell) it's people who are single, and don't particularly like being reminded of that fact.

Myself, I don't like it because of all the pink and hearts and flowers, all of which are things that are waaay too commercial when it comes to accurate representations of love. However, to each their own-- I'll celebrate in my way, they can celebrate in theirs. Even if my way happens to be not celebrating it (hey, maybe one day when I'm not single on V-day, I'll start my own tradition. Until then, there isn't much to be done).

Still other people don't like it because it's like Christmas-- a commercialized holiday that loses it's original intent because of that fact.

Why do/Do you not like Valentine's Day?

[Sperrit]

Well, at this point in time Valentine's Day IS just a commercial holiday. The Catholic Church dropped Valentine's as a Saint day quite a while ago, so there's no religious background for it any more, nor do they even recognize a St. Valentine anymore because of all the disparity regarding who he was and why he should be a saint. However, the original reasons for having Valentine's Day are even more insidious. It was originally concieved as a way to, guess what, block a pagan holiday! Shocking, isn't it? I won't go into details, but, regardless, Valentine's Day really doesn't mean a whole heck of a lot in the long run. I suppose that if I did have a girlfriend that I would do something nice for her on this day, but I really don't see why this day should be different than any other. I'd like to think that I don't need an excuse to be nice to my girlfriend, to give her gifts and tell her that I care (if I had one) and the expectation created by having this holiday is really it's most treacherous aspect. After all, dissappointment is only a result of unfullfilled expectation, and the popular expectation created in this culture with the propogation of this holiday is it's greatest failure. People who have significant others are let down if those people don't do something and those that don't have significant others feel left out. It's nothing but a big dissappointment that added on to our society's already long list of things that it convinces us to be jealous or dissappointed about.
Personally, though? I really don't give a hoot about V day one way or the other.

Join the Fun

[ShinkuKitsune]

I don't celebrate the big V-day... I just don't like it... too commercial, too directed towards couples (who in the case of people at my highschool are really in over there heads and just -think- they're in love) and their moochie-smoochie 'romantic relationships'.... all that kinda stuff. Instead, I celebrate Jellyfish Day. (No Joke.)

[emmy]

HORMONES!!!!!!! -shakey fist- curse you hormones!

[Shurikane]

Kyo-Wa jokingly renamed it to Hallmark's day.

In any case - if you really love your friend, you don't really need a V-Day to prove it to her.